*spoiler warning*
If you’ve seen season one or two of Love is Blind, then you know who Nick and Vanessa Lachey are. The couple, obsessed with putting love to the test, released a new show on Netflix this past April: The Ultimatum: Marry or Move On.
For those of you who are unfamiliar, the premise of the show is interesting, to say the least. Nick and Vanessa first bring on six different couples. One person in each couple has presented the other with an ultimatum involving marriage or children, despite their partners expressing that they aren’t ready for such steps. The couples immediately break up, and the new singles are given the opportunity to date each other for a couple of days. After this, they must each choose a new person to live and experience “marriage” with for three weeks. Once these three weeks are over, each person then returns to their original partner to do the same thing for yet another three weeks. At the end of this six-week period, each person must decide whether they want to stay with the person they arrived with, be with the person they met while filming the show, or leave single.
Although I have never been in a serious and committed relationship myself, I will still be the first to say that perhaps every person on this show needs therapy, which made the show that much more interesting. For one, the idea of having to get on a reality show to make your significant other realize that they want to marry you is so bizarre to me. One thing about me: if I have to get you on a show to marry me, baby it’s just not gonna work. Not only that, but I think that for every couple, the reasons the ultimatums were given in the first place cannot simply be fixed within this experiment. Take, for example, your significant other not wanting to have kids at all… how exactly do you expect this show to solve that problem? In addition, none of these couples had even been together for three years before one partner gave the other an ultimatum. And some of these people are just way too young to be issuing ultimatums. At 23 years old, why are you so desperate to get married and have kids? You’re just out of college! Give yourself time to live your own life for a bit and find some semblance of security! In this review, I’ll be summarizing the dynamics of the original couples to avoid a 30-page article.
For those of you who are unfamiliar, the premise of the show is interesting, to say the least. Nick and Vanessa first bring on six different couples. One person in each couple has presented the other with an ultimatum involving marriage or children, despite their partners expressing that they aren’t ready for such steps. The couples immediately break up, and the new singles are given the opportunity to date each other for a couple of days. After this, they must each choose a new person to live and experience “marriage” with for three weeks. Once these three weeks are over, each person then returns to their original partner to do the same thing for yet another three weeks. At the end of this six-week period, each person must decide whether they want to stay with the person they arrived with, be with the person they met while filming the show, or leave single.
Although I have never been in a serious and committed relationship myself, I will still be the first to say that perhaps every person on this show needs therapy, which made the show that much more interesting. For one, the idea of having to get on a reality show to make your significant other realize that they want to marry you is so bizarre to me. One thing about me: if I have to get you on a show to marry me, baby it’s just not gonna work. Not only that, but I think that for every couple, the reasons the ultimatums were given in the first place cannot simply be fixed within this experiment. Take, for example, your significant other not wanting to have kids at all… how exactly do you expect this show to solve that problem? In addition, none of these couples had even been together for three years before one partner gave the other an ultimatum. And some of these people are just way too young to be issuing ultimatums. At 23 years old, why are you so desperate to get married and have kids? You’re just out of college! Give yourself time to live your own life for a bit and find some semblance of security! In this review, I’ll be summarizing the dynamics of the original couples to avoid a 30-page article.
Alexis & HunteR
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The first couple I’m going to talk about is Alexis (25) and Hunter (28), who were together for two years at the time of filming. Alexis initially gave Hunter an ultimatum because she was ready to get married. Hunter, however, was hesitant to propose without having lived with Alexis first. As they dated around for the first couple days, Hunter expressed being nervous about living with another woman, while Alexis started stirring up trouble with another man. Alexis found herself quickly attracted to another man (Colby) who did not feel the same attraction towards her, which was just unfathomable to Alexis, resulting in her labeling him as a horrible person– and she wasn’t shy about it either. At the dinner where each person decides who they want to spend their first three weeks with, Alexis found herself not having anyone to choose from, but alas, her man came to the rescue. Hunter actually decided to propose to Alexis right then and there, rather than continuing on with the show’s plan, and, of course, Alexis said yes. At the reunion, the couple was still together and planning their wedding. I’m still giving her major side-eye at her difficulty to accept rejection, but I wish them all the best!
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Lauren & Nate
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The next couple is Lauren (26) and Nate (30), who were together for two and a half years at the time of filming. With this couple, Nate issued Lauren an ultimatum: ready to get married and start having kids. Lauren, though she loved Nate, had expressed many times that she did not want to have children whatsoever. Once the couple split in the first episode, they spent some time with other people, where Lauren actually started to consider having children, but it all went out of the window at the deciding dinner. Here, once realizing that all his options have chosen other men, and just seeing Hunter propose to Alexis, Nate surprisingly proposes to Lauren, despite telling another woman just a few minutes prior that he would be choosing her. Even more surprisingly, Lauren actually said yes to Nate’s proposal, leaving everyone baffled since they never resolved their main issue– whether or not they would be having children. At the reunion, the couple was still together and revealed that Lauren agreed to having at least one child for the time being. I only hope that she is genuinely okay with having a kid; otherwise, more problems will arise later down the road, and everything becomes more complicated when a child is involved.
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Shanique & Randall
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Next up we have Shanique (24) and Randall (26), who were only together for a year and a half before Shanique presented Randall with an ultimatum. Randall expressed that he simply wanted to be more secure before marriage and children, but as the show progressed, I saw more and more problems arise, their biggest issue being communication. When faced with a conflict, Shanique would do a complete 180, becoming very immature or shutting down and running away from these problems, making it difficult for said conflict to be resolved. Randall would not know how or even want to continue on at these points, making their relationship just a bit toxic. In the end, I do think that coming on the show was actually a good thing for them. Randall did propose to Shanique in the last episode, but at the reunion, they revealed that they actually broke off their engagement and took a long break from each other, but eventually got back together. I think this break was necessary for them to work on themselves before committing to each other, and I could tell that they both did some necessary maturing, so I’m rooting for them.
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April & Jake
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April (23) gave Jake (26) an ultimatum: ready to get married and start having kids immediately. Jake, on the other hand, wanted to travel some and be financially stable first, after just having left the military. These two are polar opposites, with April having a very strong personality and Jake being more on the calm side. I was rooting for them at first, but soon enough, a lot was revealed about their relationship as well. For one, April thought that this show was exactly what Jake needed to realize that he wanted to marry her. However, Jake actually came to the realization that he was not as happy in his relationship with April as he thought he was, and he felt like he was never listened to or understood. For Jake, living with someone else for three weeks actually pushed him away from April, who was only more ready to marry Jake at the end. When the couple came back together after the first three weeks, nothing was the same for them, and they faced argument after argument, even on April’s birthday. In the last episode, Jake and April actually broke up, with Jake promising April that he would not be running off with another girl, only to present said girl with plane tickets to anyplace immediately after. At the reunion, they revealed that they were still broken up. Jake was single at the time, but April shared that she had moved on to a new man. I’m actually glad that these two broke up, because they simply aren’t for each other and are better off with other people.
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Rae & Zay
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Whew chile. If any of these couples raised my blood pressure, it was this one right here. From the moment we were introduced to Rae (24) and Zay (25) and learned that Rae issued Zay an ultimatum after two and half years, I felt that something was off. For one, Rae was not able to say why she loved Zay or why she felt like she was ready for marriage, outside of listing off the qualities of a housewife, despite having issued the ultimatum demanding marriage. In addition, she just gave me pick-me. At some points, I was genuinely confused on which one of them actually wanted to get married and whether or not either of them were ready to, but I soon realized that neither of them were. As the show progressed, I could tell that Rae literally had no personality (sounds harsh but is totally true). The whole time, she kept expressing how similar she was to Jake, but this was only because she literally just cosigned on everything he had to say. I also saw that Zay has a lot of unresolved issues from his past that he needs to deal with before committing to any relationship. At some points, he rubbed me the wrong way, because he was aware enough of his issues that he was able to hide behind them and use them to defend some questionable behavior, but would run away from confronting these issues, not only to be a better partner, but just to be a better person for himself. It was when the couple came back together after their first three weeks apart that I knew they had no business being with each other. At this point, they had each done a 180, with Zay being ready to marry Rae, who was all of a sudden on the fence about their relationship. Throughout the second half of the show, these two proved to be a very toxic relationship and were unable to communicate as grown adults or work through their issues. They decided to call it quits before the last episode, and during the reunion, where it was revealed that they still saw each other from time to time, a lot went down between them, resulting in yelling, gaslighting, and unaccepted apologies. In the end, it was definitely best for the two to break up, and I hope they each work on themselves before getting involved with other people.
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Madlyn & Colby
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Madlyn (24) and Colby (25) were ahem… interesting. Respectfully, I dislike them both. Colby gave Madlyn an ultimatum after a year and a half together, claiming that he would be leaving Madlyn if she didn’t come around to marrying him. At first, they seemed like okay people, but their true colors started to show soon enough. During a dinner date between the ladies of the show, Madlyn, who was living with Shanique’s ex Randall, couldn’t help but rub her and Randall’s relationship in Shanique’s face, which annoyed me to no end. Shanique is better than me because I would’ve been jumping across tables. When the couple came back together, Madlyn found out that Colby was texting other girls while they were apart, which he thought was not at all a problem, using the premise of the show to defend his actions. During their three weeks together, Madlyn and Colby showed, at least to me, that they probably shouldn’t have stayed together. The entire time, Madlyn was debating with herself over whether or not she should stay with Colby, and she kept asking for her friend’s opinions instead of considering the choice herself, while Colby remained unapologetic for his actions until the very end. In the end, I was sure that the two would break up. However, I think it’s fair to say that everyone was surprised when Colby proposed to Madlyn in the last episode, and ms. girl actually said yes. What really snatched my wig off was when they got married RIGHT THEN AND THERE. The math was not mathing for me, and I just couldn’t figure out how we got to that point. At the reunion, we were even more surprised to see that the two were still married… and expecting their first child. I never thought they’d last, but for the sake of their daughter, I wish them all the best and I hope that they’ve actually worked through all their issues.
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All in all, this show was a rollercoaster from beginning to end. But if you happen to enjoy drama as much as I do, you should definitely watch it… maybe at 1.5x speed though.
Many of you only know me as one of the editors making sure articles don’t come out bad, but I am honored to have written this for my first-ish and last article for BALM,
byeeeeeee <3!
Many of you only know me as one of the editors making sure articles don’t come out bad, but I am honored to have written this for my first-ish and last article for BALM,
byeeeeeee <3!
Isatou Sey
