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Rating Valentine Candy
(they’re all bad)

Allyse Walker, February 2023

I love candy as much as the next person, but for a candy centered holiday, most valentine candy is awful. So to let you know what you should and shouldn't buy now that it's all on sale, I'm going to rank them from the absolute worst to the absolute best. 
SWEETHEART CANDY
There’s no way people actually like this. It tastes like a bad version of a Sweet Tart candy. Sure they’re cute, and they’re a Valentine’s Day staple candy, but they just are not good. 0/10

HEART-SHAPED CHOCOLATES
Now this can go one of two ways: You can get the good kind of chocolate with the good stuff on the inside or you can get the bad kind with the bad filling. At the end of the day, just ask your girlfriend what kind of chocolate she likes. If done right, then 10/10. If done wrong, then 2/10. Overall, I give it a 5/10. 

SKITTLES 
I don't know if this is just me, but I do not like Skittles. They taste weird and get stuck in your teeth and just aren’t a good candy. 0/10

HERSHEY'S KISSES
I love Hershey's kisses. They're probably my favorite way to eat chocolate. The only downside is how quickly they melt, but other than that, a very good candy. 9/10 

FUN DIP
Straight sugar. 10/10 

TURTLES
Personally, I hate peanuts and caramel in candy, so this is a 0/10 for me. (I've never had the candy, though.)  

RING POPS
Funny diamond-looking candy. 10/10

TRUFFLE CHOCOLATE
Truffle chocolate is another one of my favorite ways to eat chocolate. Even though I hate peanuts, I will forever love this candy. 11/10

HEART-SHAPED LOLLYPOPS
Disgusting. -1/10

In conclusion, the way to make your partner happy during Valentine's Day is to ask them what kind of candy they like! A simple yes or no will always lead to the right answer.

Allyse Walker

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  • Home
    • Black History Month Collection >
      • Angelica Dass: The Nature of Color
      • Chicago's Historian, My Father
      • Top 3 Black Artists
      • Pain For Profit
      • Black Historical Figures
      • Hiding Behind the Strength
    • Women's History Month >
      • Books Written by Women
      • women are amazing
      • A Celebration Of Women's Achievements
      • Anonymous Stories: Women’s History Month
    • Hispanic Heritage Month >
      • Hispanic Heritage Month
      • Top 5 Books for Hispanic Heratige Month
      • El Día de los Muertos - FAQ
      • Mexican Independence Day
      • Hispanic Artists
      • Hispanic Authors
    • PODCAST >
      • Love & Dating
      • All Things Black History
    • BALM Founders
    • Teacher's Corner >
      • Teacher's Corner: Gordon
      • Teacher's Corner: Ejzak
      • Teacher's Corner: David
      • Teacher's Corner: Wilde
    • Sports/Clubs
    • Student Businesses
    • Resources >
      • LGBTQ+ Resources
  • Meet Us
    • Socials >
      • Google Forms
  • This Month
    • Op-Eds >
      • Rating Valentine Candy (they’re all bad)
      • Why Are Beyoncé Tickets So Expensive?
      • Love Tropes (Ranked)
      • What Disney Couples Teach us About Love
      • Early Decision
      • Anonymous Stories: Insecurities & Self-Love
      • Why I love love
    • Black History Month 2023 >
      • Fiction Deserves Black Literature for Black People
      • The Diaspora Wars
      • Growing Up Black
      • The Duality of Afro-Latinos
      • 5 Thing That Make me Happy as a Black Person
      • Black Girls' Hair
      • Hot Takes From A Tired Black Girl
    • Media Reviews >
      • Hi-Fi Rush game review
      • YOU Season 4 Review
      • Strong Woman Do Bong-Soon
      • Roomates of Poongduck 304
      • A Good Girl’s Guide to Murder Book Review
    • CREATIVE WRITING >
      • always wanting more (Trinity - Poem)
      • Cool, Calm, and Collected
      • Armageddon
    • Location Reviews >
      • Navy Pier
    • Sports Panel >
      • Chess Team Sports Analysis
  • Featured Article
  • Humans of Brooks
    • Black Excellence