February is not only Black History Month, but also a month of love. Sure, Valentine’s Day and all of the couples are sweet, but there’s still an important type of love not to be left out: self-love.
Many people struggle to love themselves in the midst of the awareness of their flaws. The truth is, we all have our not-so-lovable sides. The key is to see them and accept those parts of yourself. They make you who you are and can empower you if you let them.
In order to show you that being imperfect is completely normal, here are some real-life confessions from your peers here at Brooks. You might even find that you’re not the only one who feels the way that you do.
Many people struggle to love themselves in the midst of the awareness of their flaws. The truth is, we all have our not-so-lovable sides. The key is to see them and accept those parts of yourself. They make you who you are and can empower you if you let them.
In order to show you that being imperfect is completely normal, here are some real-life confessions from your peers here at Brooks. You might even find that you’re not the only one who feels the way that you do.
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Q.1 : What are you insecure about?
A.1: I guess not being enough or successful in life. Especially when it comes to, like, sports or whatever. So, like, I feel lost at the moment--but not really. I know what I want to do, but I kinda can’t see the form of it. I’m mainly scared of failure.
A.2: Um, a lot of things. Mostly, I feel like I’m insecure about how others see me. It’s like if I do something, they might not take it the way I intended.
A.3. I’m insecure about nothing as an alpha male myself. I like to help those around me. . .The thing I’m most insecure about is my physical body itself. It could be bigger, it could be this, it could be so many other things that aren’t what I am now. It’s kinda like not fully living up to your potential. You’re kind of a waste.
A.4. I think one of my biggest insecurities is, uh, the way people look at me. So, how they judge me. Obviously when I’m not talking to them. How they look at me, how they view me, how they think I am as a person. Like that experiment we did with Dr. Warren. The whole personality thing and how they think my self-esteem is and how my traits are, things like that.
A.5. I’m insecure about a lot of things. Like my voice, you know, my friendships sometimes--they’ll end prematurely--that I’m not good enough for certain things. But then, I have to look past that and. . .just move on from that!
A.6. Currently, I’m insecure about my face. I feel like you have to look a certain way in this society, as to where there are beauty standards. You have to put on lip gloss, make sure your face is clear, wear lashes, put on makeup, make sure your eyebrows are okay. People are always looking to make sure that your face is clear. They’re like, “Oh, she’s ugly. She ain’t got on no makeup,” stuff like that. That’s how society is today, so I’m very insecure about my face.
A.7. One thing that I’m trying to accept is my body hair. Boys, specifically, used to compare me to bears and how much hairier I was than their guy friends. This made me feel less feminine. I struggle to even wear crop tops and stuff to this day because of how society--guys, really--view hair on women’s bodies.
A.1: I guess not being enough or successful in life. Especially when it comes to, like, sports or whatever. So, like, I feel lost at the moment--but not really. I know what I want to do, but I kinda can’t see the form of it. I’m mainly scared of failure.
A.2: Um, a lot of things. Mostly, I feel like I’m insecure about how others see me. It’s like if I do something, they might not take it the way I intended.
A.3. I’m insecure about nothing as an alpha male myself. I like to help those around me. . .The thing I’m most insecure about is my physical body itself. It could be bigger, it could be this, it could be so many other things that aren’t what I am now. It’s kinda like not fully living up to your potential. You’re kind of a waste.
A.4. I think one of my biggest insecurities is, uh, the way people look at me. So, how they judge me. Obviously when I’m not talking to them. How they look at me, how they view me, how they think I am as a person. Like that experiment we did with Dr. Warren. The whole personality thing and how they think my self-esteem is and how my traits are, things like that.
A.5. I’m insecure about a lot of things. Like my voice, you know, my friendships sometimes--they’ll end prematurely--that I’m not good enough for certain things. But then, I have to look past that and. . .just move on from that!
A.6. Currently, I’m insecure about my face. I feel like you have to look a certain way in this society, as to where there are beauty standards. You have to put on lip gloss, make sure your face is clear, wear lashes, put on makeup, make sure your eyebrows are okay. People are always looking to make sure that your face is clear. They’re like, “Oh, she’s ugly. She ain’t got on no makeup,” stuff like that. That’s how society is today, so I’m very insecure about my face.
A.7. One thing that I’m trying to accept is my body hair. Boys, specifically, used to compare me to bears and how much hairier I was than their guy friends. This made me feel less feminine. I struggle to even wear crop tops and stuff to this day because of how society--guys, really--view hair on women’s bodies.
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Q.2: What advice would you give to someone who’s insecure?
A.1. I guess I would say, like, if you are insecure, you should try not to rely on social media. I feel like social media feeds into a lot of people’s insecurities. I think it makes you see those things [flaws], so I think that if you are insecure about those things you should take a break.
A.2. I would say, be confident in who you are and the power that lies dormant within you. Oftentimes, we are afraid of--not of what people believe we are, or who we are to be--but rather, we’re afraid of the power that we have lying within us. It’s all up to the individual to unearth that hidden source of power and confidence within themselves.
A.3. Even if you’re insecure, it shouldn’t change what you do in your life. You shouldn’t let that control you and you should just, you know, be yourself! To be honest, in my opinion, there really shouldn’t be anything you’re insecure about because you’re special and unique in your own way and you should embrace that! The people that love you will love you for your insecurities.
A.4. The things that helped me accept myself were surrounding myself with people who accepted all parts of me, reading the Bible for a healthier mindset, and speaking affirmations to myself whenever I can. Hopefully some of those options could help.
A.1. I guess I would say, like, if you are insecure, you should try not to rely on social media. I feel like social media feeds into a lot of people’s insecurities. I think it makes you see those things [flaws], so I think that if you are insecure about those things you should take a break.
A.2. I would say, be confident in who you are and the power that lies dormant within you. Oftentimes, we are afraid of--not of what people believe we are, or who we are to be--but rather, we’re afraid of the power that we have lying within us. It’s all up to the individual to unearth that hidden source of power and confidence within themselves.
A.3. Even if you’re insecure, it shouldn’t change what you do in your life. You shouldn’t let that control you and you should just, you know, be yourself! To be honest, in my opinion, there really shouldn’t be anything you’re insecure about because you’re special and unique in your own way and you should embrace that! The people that love you will love you for your insecurities.
A.4. The things that helped me accept myself were surrounding myself with people who accepted all parts of me, reading the Bible for a healthier mindset, and speaking affirmations to myself whenever I can. Hopefully some of those options could help.
Hopefully after reading this article, you have found that you’re not alone in your struggles. Whether you’re in a relationship or not, the first and most important step is making sure you’re okay. So, take the time to tune into yourself and appreciate everything that makes you you.
mAYA bANKS
